Shark Teeth
by IDespiseTragedy
Summary: After a quarrel with Haru, the morose Rin went jogging and chanced upon Makoto, from whom he learned there was more to it in his partner than what Haru had led him to believe.


Title: **Shark Teeth**

Credits: Thank you so much to _KleonLumi,_ _White Eevee_ , & _Lissy Stage_ for beta reading

Disclaimer: Nah, _Free!_ ain't mine; sheesh!

* * *

 **Shark Teeth**

Sweat streaking down his skin and clinging to his shirt, Rin slowed down his pace to catch his breath. While a fifty-minute jog did not solve the problems that weighed heavily upon him, it did wonders to calm his troubled mind. Some forty meters ahead, beneath the moon peeking from behind the clouds, a vending machine stood next to a park bench.

Slowing to a walk, Rin headed to the park bench, throat so dry it almost hurt. Just as he was about to tap the mineral water button the machine's panel, Haru's voice rang inside his head, _"Stop being a dick! I've never told you how to live your life. Why can't you respect the choices I make for myself in return?"_

Rin gritted his teeth, finger hovering near the button. Not wanting to have anything to do with Haru's favorite drink for now, he changed directions and selected a sports drink.

"Rin?" A soothingly familiar voice greeted him from behind as he collected his drink from the machine.

Rin spun around to find a tall figure carrying a plastic bag in each hand. "Makoto."

The cordial gleam in Makoto's eyes transformed into one of concern after a moment of surveying Rin's own expression. "You look upset. What's wrong?"

They sat together on the wrought iron bench, separated only by Makoto's groceries. Neither spoke again before they took a sip of their respective drinks.

"Wanna talk about it?" Makoto coaxed with a gentle smile.

Strangers who didn't know any better wouldn't suspect that smile to be anything more than kindness. However, Rin knew Makoto well enough to know that his smile meant he would keep urging until Rin spilled the beans.

Rin took another sip, delaying the inevitable. Whilst Rin knew he would confess soon enough, Makoto could not be certain. He needn't know just yet that Rin was indeed in need of a sounding board for his current issues. Eventually, finding no tangible way to continue his short vow of silence, Rin asked, "Do you think Haru loves me? Like, really loves me, outside of swimming?"

Makoto snorted. As soon as he noticed Rin's grave expression, however, he immediately morphed his face into something more solemn. "Sorry, it's just ridiculous you'd need to ask when the only three things that are sure to make Haru's eyes sparkle are water, mackerel, and Matsuoka Rin."

"I … thought I knew that," Rin trailed off, his jaw clenching and unclenching itself. _Exactly, what am I to Haru? A safety clutch for companionship? A convenience?_ "But now I'm not so sure anymore. Whenever we're not swimming, all we do is bicker. You, Rei, and Nagisa don't argue with him as often as me, so I—" Rin faltered. A pang, like the clean cut of a scythe through a swath of reeds, slashed through him. For years the doubt had grown and coiled its thorny vines around his heart; nevertheless, it felt as if speaking of it would soon turn his agony into reality. "I just… What if it's better for us _not_ to be together? During my training in Australia, before our first Olympics, we argued less because, obviously, we weren't around each other long enough to."

With the forbearance rivaling that of a teacher explaining how one plus one worked to a dim-witted pupil, Makoto asserted, "Rin, let's not forget that Haru values freedom above all other aspects of life. To him, freedom of choice is the ultimate proof of love. Plus, with you and Haru, it's opposites attract—it has always been that way, even as far back as when we were in elementary school together."

Like the breaking of a dam, resentment came pouring out of Rin's mouth, the bitterness on his tongue growing more astringent with every word he spoke. "What good is the attraction for, if we keep arguing over little things?"

At that moment, the large clock in the middle of the park chimed, as it did at every hour, to announce seven o' clock. The sound reprimanded Rin for behaving immaturely, depending on Makoto to solve the trivial problem between him and Haru. He drew a sharp intake of breath. "Kisumi's probably waiting for you at home. I shouldn't keep you here."

"It's fine; I'm in no rush. The basketball club Kisumi coaches is in the middle of a training camp, so he won't be home before tomorrow evening."

Both hands clasped around the sports drink bottle, Rin stared ahead at the long, slanted shadow cast by a nearby lamppost. Haru was the rival of his life as well as his first and last romance, and yet … there were times some parts of him felt that Makoto would have deserved Haru better. He had vowed to himself to treasure Haru when Haru rejected Makoto with a _"Thank you for your feelings, but I'm sorry I can't see you as something other than a friend,"_ all those years ago. Still, that didn't change the fact that Makoto had always understood Haru better than Rin ever could.

"More importantly," Makoto continued, "tell me what caused the fight between you two this time."

"Just a difference of opinions over our training regiments. No biggie, really … well, it wasn't supposed to be." Rin wished he could shrug to prove his point, but his body simply lagged.

"Says the one sulking."

"Look, the practices, the dietary requirements… I know what's best for my body, but Haru deviates from what his coach tells him. _Deliberately_ ," Rin suppressed a sigh. "What if his performance decreases? I don't want him to lose in the upcoming Olympic because he isn't in top condition, especially since he'll be defending his gold medal for 100-meter freestyle."

"You're also going to defend your gold for 200-meter butterfly, aren't you? And as an athlete, you know that food and exercise aren't all the factors that determine a victory. Think about his mental state, Rin. Suppose there's nothing wrong with his health, but he no longer loves the water because everyone around him keeps pushing him and pushing him until swimming ultimately becomes a chore; won't the same thing that occurred at our third year's regional tournament simply repeat itself?"

Rin swallowed. He remembered Haru stopping halfway in that competition: The Iwatobi ace swimmer had stood in the middle of the lane, looking baffled. Rin had confronted Haru in the locker room then, demanding an explanation as to why Haru had disqualified himself in front of the scouts, and Haru had snapped at him, _"What dream? What future? It's you who cares about all that! I'm not you!"_

Rin clenched his fists. Why hadn't his current self learned from that juvenile mistake, especially since he and Haru had become a pair for almost ten years?

"Rin," Makoto started as he placed a reassuring hand on Rin's shoulder. "I'll try what I can to negotiate with Haru over his diet, but only you can lighten the burden in his heart. Haru's feelings for you aren't as lukewarm as what he has led you to believe."

Rin recalled how thoughts of Haru used to sustain him in his darkest hours during his training in Australia. Did Haru even give a damn about Rin, despite the overwhelming extent of Rin's affection? Haru was his first romance, and first romances were the most fragile of all. The problem was, Haru was also his last—the only one Rin had ever felt any sense of romantic entanglement. In Australia, how many times had he come home from bars alone with nothing but Haru in his mind, while his friends brought home their spoils of the night? Even after they had cohabited their current apartment, when was the last time Haru said he loved Rin? Heck, he barely spoke anything other than goodbye and good luck when they parted ways for different competitions!

 _Really? Why doesn't he cling to me, half—no, a quarter—the amount Nagisa clings to Rei, at the very least?_ Rin wanted to shout. In the end, he settled with, "In the pool, it seems obvious we each need the other to boost his performance, but outside of that…" Rin sucked in a sharp breath. Unshed tears stung his eyes, blurring his vision. The more rational part of him knew he shouldn't blurt out mere assumptions to Makoto without consulting Haru first, but the ache blossoming in his chest tormented him so. He had neglected talking seriously with Haru for too long. At the moment, like water spilling from a bowl too small to contain it, Rin's frustration overflowed. "It's always me who puts in effort."

"Oh, Rin…" Makoto sighed. "Haru already considers every swimming practice with you to be a date. Being with you in the water is the time he feels most _alive_ , you know."

Makoto's gentle voice reminded Rin of the routines he had taken for granted. While Haru was definitely not the type who'd read sonnets to him, he would sometimes sit so close that their skin touched and rest his head on Rin's shoulder while watching TV from their sofa. On the days when Rin did not leave early for a morning jog, Haru would roll on top of him and drowsily make out with him. In fact, Rin often found himself roused from sleep by a wake-up kiss from Haru.

 _But what if Haru simply sees me as a fuck buddy?_ Rin chewed his lip. When it came to body compatibility, there was no room for doubt. Whenever he entered Haru, he was united with bliss, and whenever Haru was inside him, the boundary between heaven and earth no longer existed. _Is that why Haru chose to live with me all these years?_

As ridiculous as it might seem for a couple who had forged their relationship for nearly a decade, communication wasn't a smooth sailing between them. The last time Rin tried was two years before, when they had gazed at the stars from their apartment window after dinner. He had thrown a casual question, _"Hey, Haru, what do you think of us getting married?"_ and Haru'd answered him with, _"Changes would be too bothersome; I'm comfortable with what we have now."_ Rin had never risked another conversation of such serious nature ever since. How could he, when everything had seemed so precarious? It seemed that even the slightest effort to comfort Haru after yet another feud between the two would be rejected just as easily, body curling away from Rin in order to bury itself deeper within a solitary nest of blankets.

"When it comes to romance, it's not that Haru loves you more than the others; it's that he has never _had_ any other. It's always been you from the start." A benign smile graced Makoto's lips. "Rin, you're the only one Haru has regarded as a soulmate."

"Gh-uh…" Rin wished he could produce a more intellectual response, but only a grunt came out of his mouth. Makoto's explanation sounded too outlandish to his ears. He couldn't be _that_ special to Haru, could he?

Makoto chuckled. "In our first year of junior high, Haru, Kisumi, and I once played our own version of _Pictionary_ using hand-written cards. One of us would draw a card, and that person would have to complete a drawing of the word in ten seconds or less because of the limited time we had during lunch break. The others would have to guess what the picture was of. On one of Haru's turns, he sketched two serrated rows. At first, Kisumi guessed that the picture meant 'shark teeth'. Haru frowned and shook his head. I guessed penchant banners. Nope. Triangular pattern? Still no. And we went on and on until we eventually gave up. When Haru showed us the card he had drawn, the writing on the paper read: ' _beauty_.' I asked him if he had tried to draw something that represented _you_ —perhaps more than just your teeth, if he'd had more time—and he nodded."

Rin's breath hitched. Still, he listened to Makoto's explanation without interrupting him, "Well, that became our last game because Kisumi wouldn't stop teasing Haru about you afterward. But you see, of all the things he could've thought of in that moment, Haru's mind was set on you. You were his default conception of beauty, even as far back as our first year of middle school. What else do you need to prove his instinct had been inclined to form a bond with you long before he acknowledged it?"

Rin opened his mouth, but no sound came out. His throat felt dry despite the sports drink he had consumed prior.

"Then, of course, starting from the next year, Haru wasn't the same. He wouldn't voice his reason for quitting the swim club or competitive swimming altogether, but it happened soon after he defeated you at the Iwatobi Swimming Club and you returned to Australia."

Realization struck Rin. Abruptly rising to his feet, he said, "Thanks, Makoto. I owe you one."

Without waiting for Makoto's reply, Rin dashed back to his and Haru's shared apartment. With every restless step he took, the more urgent the feeling to embrace Haru grew. Every millimeter of his body, every fiber of his being, and every particle of his molecule coveted Nanase Haruka.

The mouth-watering aroma of freshly seared beef teased Rin's nostrils the moment he opened the front door. As soon as he kicked off his shoes, he darted towards the kitchen at maximum velocity, nearly tripping over their umbrella stand. He poked his head through the entryway and saw Haru in his usual blue apron, ladling miso soup from the small pot into two bowls. It was as though the disagreement between them earlier had never occurred save for the absence of mackerel from Haru's daily menu, which didn't escape Rin's notice.

Haru spared a singular glance at Rin with the pair of clear blue eyes that had never failed to make Rin's heart do a somersault, before returning his gaze to the dish. With his usual flat tone and expressionless face, he mumbled, "Welcome back."

 _I used to assume that without you, I had nothing to aim for. But now I know: without you, my Shining, I_ am _nothing._

Rin proceeded into the kitchen, wrapped his arms around the cook's waist from behind, and nuzzled Haru's nape. Inhaling his beloved's scent, he murmured back, "I'm home."

THE END


End file.
